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03 April 2010

'Gift'

Hai...its been a long time since my last update...It just now it getting crazy since final exam is around the corner so the final assignment just flow like overflow river after heavy rain.... Plus...so many things bothering me....


It just start 3 years ago....It been a long time and i still have some adjustment to do....When i was young until im reach 17....my life just perfectly normal...just like normal teenagers....stubborn, searching for identity, searching for more attention and love and want to live on my own way without nobody telling me what i should and shouldnt do....a very normal teenagers... All that 17 years, i know i need to compete with my little sisters....for my parents attention since the my sisters, the 2nd child... she have a special gift....its not really that special....but that gift save all my family life....she have a very strong instinct (i guess)... she can felt if there will something bad going to happen....it just she dunno what, to whom or when it will happen since she was 5 years old...at first we done believe....but since the robbery at my father's shop...i tried to figure out....

That night...she dunt want to sleep...my mom and my dad tried everything and i can heard she cried from my aunt room which is just two doors away... She usually easy to fall asleep...just give her the towel that she love to cuddle while sleeping, in just second...she will sleeping....Differently that night....my dad tried everything...my mom ask for my help is i can sing a lullaby for her like i used to do when she just a baby....but it doest work....she keep pointing at the door...when we ask....she dunt want to said anything....when my mom and my dad step out the door she screaming.... my sister look at me and like to tell us something.... but then....she stop crying...its already 6 am....i went for sleep....next thing i know...my aunt wake me up...tell me my father shop which is just downstair was robbed... surprisingly.... the theft tried to break the door that was locked to go upstairs...somehow...something stop him or them....I sat there and try to figure it out...We lost more that RM 3000...Thanks God the attempt to break through to upstair where we live was failed or God know what could happen to us....

Its took me 8 years to figure after i strongly thought i have something going on....and lastly one day, i ask her if she remember the night of the robbery....her face change but calmly ask why i ask.... I said...you felt it...something gonna happen...maybe chestpain.... fast heartbeat...and sweating for no reason like you really afraid and run for your life.... She was really shocked...she look at me silently....i nodded....i think i have it now....i started to have all this things after i start my study at matriculation..... thats when i figure out about what happen that night and why my parent said she special.... .she said...all that 15 years....she tried to hold her feeling to herself...but its hard....no wonder i caught her crying by herself few time....it is because she dunno how to tell or describe.... She said....now she just think it is a gift...Thats why i understand why she was so mature....different from me...

My 'gift'..... its growing....i didt tell anybody even Faiz who already know about this....and even my sister.... I dream often now (i never dream before...my first dream was when i was 10 years old...bout my result...its come true and that is until i turn 18)....im dreaming things thats gonna happen...something i dream directly about it and sometimes i need to analysis what thats all about...the bad things is....if i was dreaming....i cant be touched or wake up or i'll lost it or forget it....so its always happen and i just realize i did dreamed about it after it was a reality.... All the feeling getting worse when i had them... Its really bothering....sometimes i cried.....sometimes i could not sleep....

I did told my sister....if was given a chance to choose either the gift or normal and bullied teenagers life....i rather get bully....like i was in primary school....


2 comments:

atsie said...

its really a nice story...
thank you for sharing :)

Mel said...

thanks...i hope u dont think that im a freak....it just something that i really could explain....