09 June 2013

Worried too much?

Haii peoples... currently it is 3:38am... What im doing up this late? Me myself dont know why... It just so many things in my mind right now... Feels like want to explode soon. Making it health condition not helping at all...

Two days ago, i received news from my sisters... Its turn out my youngest sister appeal to enter Labuan Matriculation College was approved. She was given one year program just like me and other younger sister who just finish her study there. Matriculation is a good opportunity... it teaches how to survive university life later and teach us to be independent and learn how to evaluate people. And its not easy to get there. Believe me... people looked up for those who manage to get himself/herself in there especially when we are from small town. Im not ashamed  to say that i make my parents proud when i was selected to go there 6 years ago since peoples around us looked up at my family and I. Then a year ago... my sister selected to attend the school which resulting to some level of respect. Actually... All three of us attend the same school since we were young and somehow... we kindda a popular student... starting with me... the good name continues and the legacy of Tang's family continue on and we were known not only we are Tang's which really bring all the tension to us three siblings since we need to act like Goddess to preserve the good name.

However, the tension have more impacts on my youngest sister. Being a Tang and also a youngest sister to two older sister whom has our own popularity in school and also at our small village stressed her out since peoples always comparing us. Between three of us, im more the trouble maker and also such a pain but outside... im The Goddess that many people adore despite my physical look... I gain respects due to my bluntness since i always do whatever i think is right and hell dont care what people think about me. Despite that, teachers like me. On the other hand... the middle daughter was a truly Goddess outside and inside. She is the sweetest person that i ever known.... as the middle child, she is the one who always has the responsibility and only her can prevent my youngest sister and I at each other throat. Thats the reason people adore her and like her a lot. Plus she is more clever that me and her grade always higher than me...

Lastly my youngest sister. She is both my sister and I and double that up.... She is both... the Angel and also the Devil. She is most beautiful between all three of us... She has a great and straight hair... i adore her so much.... however there are sometimes i wish to strangle her. She is Miss Attitude. However her academic level is at average which is slightly below us... but i know deeply in my heart... she is one hell clever young lady if she work hard bit more. Since high schools, teachers always compare her to us. Issues arise when she was not selected to enter the elite class like both of us did. However she proved to everyone she also can do what we did and she manage to get a place in the best class during Form 4. She has been thru a lot... at the crucial stage of her life... we both not there... Im here at Sarawak stuck with my semester and meanwhile the other at Labuan study. Nobody was there to help her thru the period. Her result was turn out okay.

Unfortunately, she was not selected to attend the college which really disappointment and i know she was devastated... I told her that she should attend normal school... so she enrolled herself into Pre-University (Form 6) and yet so many people judging her and start comparing us again. What so bad with Form 6??? She was really sad regarding that matter. However, everything turns out well... her appeal was approved and now she will be going to Labuan next week.

Since I received that news... i cant study well or sleep well... im too worried... How she gonna survived there... will she be okay... will she misses us... will she get a good friend... will she get a good roommates like we did.... will she get a creepy roommate like i did.... the questions just floating around my mind... I know she is a big girl now... but in my heart... deeply inside.. she always my baby sister that i will always worried.....